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Gossip Girl: Just because you speak doesn’t mean I will engage

Every so often it happens, someone wants to talk about someone else’s life, troubles & drama.  Far more often than not, it is not out of genuine concern or desire to help the affected individual(s) in any way.  It’s gossip, plain & simple.

The problem is that it can sometimes feel awkward to shut the conversation down.  Sometimes the beginning of the conversation seems innocent enough but then takes on a life of its own and although we feel uneasy about continuing the discussion, we don’t know how to end it. Some of us are more comfortable than others engaging in this type of dialogue.

For those who are uncomfortable with it but don’t know how to navigate through the quagmire…I’m here to tell you that there is nothing wrong with saying:

“I don’t engage in discussions about other people’s problems unless it is with the person who is having the problem.”

It may feel funny the first time you say it, but it will get progressively easier the second and third times, until you find it to be a natural response.  Those who like to engage in these types of discussions may stop approaching you – all the better.

We’re all pressed for time.  Look at it as a time-saving technique if nothing else.  Think about all the things that you can do with the extra time you have saved by NOT engaging in gossip:

  • – Contact the person in need to see if they need anything or to let them know that your thoughts are with them
  • – Do something kind for that, or another, person in need
  • – Do something kind for yourself: get an express mani, an Ice Cap or your favourite coffee
  • – Flip through a magazine
  • – Play a game with your kids
  • – Go to the gym
  • – Fill in the blank with any activity or thing on your to-do list that you’ve been wanting to get to but haven’t had the time.

Think of it as preserving your human environment.

Conserve your time & energy, two very precious resources and make your community a more beautiful and caring place to live.

Have a wonderful day & if you chose to NOT engage in gossip today, I’d love to hear what you did with your extra time!

Tanya

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